[ Insert Cry of Frustration Here]

I have to do something I don't want to do.
I'm not being forced into it, but its the knowing that there is something unknown, a mystery that I will never solve unless I do this thing I don't want to do.
I am a future-looker, which is why I'm where I'm at, but that is beside the point. If I was not a future-looker, I would not have to do this thing I don't want to do.
It all goes back to this "accused" thing. I am misunderstood, people judge me for who I am. But I would most definitely rather be criticized for who I am than loved for who I'm not.

And so, I am going to do this thing I don't want to do.

"I'll put on my best and
I'll stick out my chest and
I'm off to the races again."


I am Aubrey Fitzgerald, and I WILL do hard things.

Today I

Today I woke up to Channing Tatum hanging on my wall. He is beautiful. Today will be a good day.
            p.s. this all didn't happen today, its just...figurative?
Today I spent time with my drooling, giggling nephew. He is beautiful too. Today will be a good day.
Today I went to the temple. It was wonderfully spiritual. Today will be a happy day.
Today I helped someone feel the spirit. My fingers listen to the spirit better than I do. Today will be a happy day.
Today I saw the good in someone who has made bad choices. It made him beautiful to me. Today will be a wonderful day.
Today I made the shy girl laugh. I think we're going to be friends. Today will be a wonderful day.
Today I was patient
Today I held my tongue 
Today I smiled for someone else
Today someone else smiled too
Today I focused on the good parts
Today I thought life was colorful
Today I thought life was wonderful


I am Aubrey Fitzgerald, and today I am an optimist.  

Half Full

I've been accused.

One doesn't just escape that predicament in the 21st century.  To the world, I am unenthusiastic, irritable, shallow, half-hearted, vain, clumsy, bored, ugly, who knows what else.
But mostly, to the world, I am misunderstood.

Maybe I just don't want to shout out what I feel to humanity.

Some have complained that I'm ditzy, that I only care about the outside. Some have said I'm not pretty enough.

But I'm not letting that get to me anymore. I am me, and I am extraordinary.


I am Aubrey Fitzgerald, and I have not lost my muchness.

When I Was Young

I did not fully grasp the concept of being little when I was. I was always interesting in growing up, pretending I was somebody else, somebody older.
My name was Bailey, or Ashley, depending on the day. I was a princess, banished for jumping rope in a dress. I made my own kingdom, where Ken, Barbie and My Little Pony were my subjects, and we all lived happily ever after.
Then I was called up for dinner.

Now that I'm older I wish I was young. Most people do, don't they? But not young physically, or mentally, just young in spirit. I envision that girl I'm going to be. The one who helps people be better without even trying, the one who dies you because her work here is finished. I want to be the one who chooses babysitting over a party, the one who still colors in coloring books, just because she does. I am a girl who does what she does because she can.

I am Aubrey Fitzgerald, and I can do anything.

Summer Lovin'

The things I love about summer. Oh, the list could go on.
The sound of sprinklers, for one thing, is the most relaxing sound. It makes me miss my five-year-old body and that sunflower swimming suit I used to live in.
Number two, sunkissed skin. I just like the word sunkissed. The sun is warm, kissing in romantic...being tan is just a warm, romantic thing.
Number three, flip flops. That's all I have to say. Except toe hair is nasty.
Number four, sleeping. I love feeling groggy. Is that weird? But I especially love being warm and in my bed.
Number five, walking barefoot. Its like I'm becoming one with the earth.
Number six, star gazing. Just picture yourself laying on your back in the cool grass, with the crickets chirping nearby and the silver clouds parting for you so you can look at the holes in the curtains of heaven.
Those are just six things, but they're six gorgeous things.

I am Aubrey Fitzgerald, and I am addicted to summer.

Ambitions

I have plans. Yep. Little old me is going to make this world into something extraordinary. I'm going to play violin and organ and piano and wow the world just to get a scholarship.
Then I'll follow in the family's footsteps and immerse myself in BYU culture for a while.
I will then meet a man, preferably resembling Ashton Kutcher and we'll get married. He's going to be a smartie.
He'll get some kind job in Portland. We'll pack up the kids and move to a quaint little house in Lake Oswego. It will be lovely.

I like making plans, have you noticed? Oh, P.S. I'm gong to Juilliard somewhere in the mix. Maybe write a little movie music or perform with a big famous symphony orchestra, like the New York Philharmonic.
I wish I played the cello or tenor sax. Those are the two most beautiful sounds in the world. My man, the one who looks like Ashton Kutcher, he's going to play the cello. Sounds hot, doesn't he?

I am Aubrey Fitzgerald, and my life is going to be Grand.

Yahoo vs. Google

Can I...
Google: have your number?
Yahoo: have this dance? lyrics
Google.

How To...
Google: train your dragon
Yahoo: lose weight
Google.

Does Your...
Google: chewing gum lose flavor on the bedpost overnight? lyrics
Yahoo: chain hang low?
Google.

What To Do When...
Google: your bored.
Yahoo: pulled over.
Yahoo. Especially since Google has incorrect grammar.

What is the...
Google: longest word in the english language?
Yahoo: montaulk monster?
Yahoo.

Where...
Google: Is my cell phone?
Yahoo: The Wild Things Are
Google.

P.S. if you remember my lyrics mash awhile ago, and you thought it was cool check out my neighboring/rivalry (?) high school's way cool lip dub to DJ Earworm's Blame it on the Pop

I Thank God for Sunsets

Tonight I saw one of the most beautiful things in the world.  And so, of course, I took a million pictures, but these ones were the best.

I got to thinking how amazing God is, and how He just randomly blesses us with something so miraculous as a sunset.

This is one of the times the world proves that there is undoubtedly a God. I don't know what you believe, but I want you to know that I believe that God is there.

And he loves us enough to give us Sunsets.  

Go here for more on what I believe...